Sitting aimlessly, staring at the stars, searching for a purpose, hoping to God that there is a storm at the end of this silence, listening closely for even the hint of mayhem, looking for signs of grandeur in the dust settled on centuries of sin.
Is this what life truly boils down to? Or is this an illusion to shield from the bitter realities of the true world?
Where am I? What am I doing here? What am I supposed to do here? What is my purpose?
There are too many questions. No answers. Or maybe answers which I don’t want to hear. Or maybe my ears ring as the deafening silence that grips my soul.
There’s darkness, it pierces through my soul, plunges me deeper into doubt. But it kills the fear, slowly. Do monsters still exist? Have I become one yet?
I’m swimming to the shore, through a lake of blood, dying to survive. Can I make it? Or will this be the end of me? Is there no majesty for those of us who know life & yet do not wish death? Are we the prisoners of war that death has claimed?
Waking up in a pool of sweat, not knowing where I am. There’s darkness outside the window. There’s silence inside my soul. It’s happening all over again. Will I ever wake up? Will I ever be free?
No, no, no. A clock strikes in the silence. Death claims me once again. But my eyes open once again. Then it happens all over, once again. & again. & again.
Is this Hell? Or is this what it feels like to live eternally? Is anyone out there? Would someone please wake me up?
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